Consider the carers

Published date18 March 2023
Each chapter opens with an engaging personal story. Honestly and without judgment, Kiper presents people struggling to connect and interact meaningfully because dementia is driving them apart. Those living or working with someone who has a dementia will instantly recognise many of these scenarios and appreciate the deep respect and unflinching candour with which Kiper analyses the impact on a relationship

We are introduced to a husband whose sudden religious piety is driving his wife up the walls, a daughter whose mother's lifelong stubbornness is exacerbated by her dementia diagnosis and a son whose father refuses to see him as a fully grown adult and mocks his inadequacies.

Unlike Sacks, Kiper has chosen not to focus upon the patients. Her book centres on the problems that caregivers routinely face. She draws upon her own experience, fascinating psychological experiments, philosophy, neurology and even literature to show how a caregiver's supposedly "healthy brain" will struggle to adapt or understand the complexities of a brain impaired by dementia. The science sits easily next to the stories, making for a surprisingly engaging read.

In the US, where Kiper is based, more than 16 million caregivers, many of whom are family members, provide $16 billion worth of unpaid care. The statistics in the UK and Ireland read similarly. Many caregivers find their finances, physical and mental health adversely impacted by their responsibilities. Whilst they often choose to care for a loved one it can be a thankless and draining experience.

Of late there has been a number of wonderful books exploring the carer's perspective, casting much-needed light on both the joys and difficult realities of looking after a person who has dementia. Recently, I've read and enjoyed some painfully honest accounts including The Reluctant Carer, which was anonymously written, and Pope Lonergan's hilarious and poignant I'll Die After Bingo. It is vital that caregivers see their experiences accurately and respectfully portrayed. It helps reveal their immense social contribution and, in an ideal world, should inform the policymakers when it comes to providing meaningful support.

What marks Travellers to Unimaginable Lands as a unique and essential read is the neurological insight which Kiper...

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