Divorce in Ireland today: Separating in a housing crisis

• Published date: 08 June 2024
• Author: Sheila Wayman, Jen Hogan
• Publication title: Irish Times: Web Edition Articles (Dublin, Ireland)

Last year in Ireland, there were 21,159 marriages and 5,218 applications for divorce. Both figures were down from 2022 (when it was 23,173 and 5,551 respectively) but may still bear hallmarks of the "Covid effect". Whether lockdown was the making or breaking of a relationship, it delayed legalities in both scenarios

When a couple splits, the conundrum of how to make two homes out of one is more challenging now than ever, with accommodation both costly and scarce. Increasingly they stay under the same roof right through the mandatory two years of "living apart" for a divorce – and sometimes beyond. Even the most amicable couples struggle to make the sums add up to give each their own place, particularly when both accommodations need to be suitable for children to stay. In fraught breakdowns, the volatility is compounded if neither can, or will, move out while they fight over what happens next.

Divorce is always a court process, whether uncontested – the vast majority – or contested. Applications are decided on by a judge, usually in the Circuit Court but, where assets are valued at more than €3 million, they may go to the High Court. Separating couples can opt for DIY divorces, without either using a solicitor, but the court still has to approve their agreement.

A jump from 4,073 divorces being sought in Ireland in 2019 to 5,226 in 2020 was attributed mainly to a change in legislation at the end of 2019. This reduced the required living apart period from four years to two years. It also made clear that spouses who reside in the same house shall be considered to be "living apart" if the court is satisfied they are not in an intimate and committed relationship.

'We don't speak, we don't eat, we don't do anything together': Inside an Irish divorce court

Dublin Rathdown Fine Gael TD Josepha Madigan, a former family lawyer, championed this reform of the divorce law, firstly publishing a private member's bill in 2016. It was later adopted as Government policy and put to the public in a referendum, which was passed by 82 per cent. It means people are unlikely to need a judicial separation before embarking on the divorce process.

"It's just nice to have alleviated that for people, from a cost and an emotional perspective," says Madigan, who had no idea at the time that she would be one of the thousands who would benefit. She and her husband, Finbarr Hayes, have since separated and are finalising their divorce. (In March, Madigan resigned her ministerial role and said she will step down from politics at the next general election.)

Here, five people who have gone through relationship breakdown and have concluded or are contemplating divorce proceedings relate their experience, and professionals involved in different aspects of divorce work talk about what they see.

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Susan: 'He's been hell bent on revenge'

Susan is still going through the divorce courts. Her husband was abusive, she says, and she finally got the strength to walk away some years back. At the time there was a four-year wait to get a divorce, so she needed to go for judicial separation in order to sell the house. For that she was in the courts for at least 30 days, she explains.

The separation took two years to complete. Her husband was abusive to her child also, she says. Not wanting to put her child through the court ordeal again so soon after the judicial separation, she decided to wait a few years before applying for a divorce.

"He's been hell bent on revenge," Susan says. The cost of her judicial separation increased significantly from the initial quote because "every time he didn't like a ruling in the courts, he appealed it and went back again", she adds. The amount of time it took to complete the process was far longer as a result.

There are other fees in addition to the legal fees, Susan says, pointing to elements such as the cost of seeing a psychologist. She estimates that, allowing for other costs and restrictions, the entire process has cost her in the region of €100,000.

They sold the house and the proceeds were split 50/50. Susan lives in rented accommodation and says that even if she could afford a house, she couldn't buy one as her husband would have a claim on the property because the divorce is not finalised.

Susan says her experience of divorce has been "really horrendous". She feels there's a "massive change needed". Due to fears of running up high legal bills again, she's representing herself in the divorce courts. Trying to get the information needed, such as pension information and bank account details, is extremely difficult, she says.

There is still some stigma around divorce, she believes. Someone told her "people give up too quickly on marriages".

Marian: 'If I sell the house neither of us would be able to...