How to stop feeling lonely
Author | Joanne Hunt |
Published date | 23 June 2022 |
Publication title | Irish Times: Web Edition Articles (Dublin, Ireland) |
How do I fix it?
Loneliness feels bad, but chastising yourself or feeling shame about it doesn't help. "A huge tip I would give with loneliness is to sit with the feeling of loneliness," says O'Dwyer. "When we feel lonely, all we want to do is avoid that feeling, but when we deny our feelings, or are harsh with ourselves, telling ourselves to 'cop on', or 'get over it', it can make us feel worse," she says. Instead, try making space for the feeling. "Our emotions are valid and they are showing up for a reason," says O'Dwyer. "Validate that feeling of loneliness and then practise compassion and kind self-talk like, 'I'm feeling lonely, this sucks, I'm going to go easy on myself'."
But everyone else seems fine
Everyone else may seem to have loads of friends and appear to be doing loads of cool stuff all the time. In two clicks or fewer, someone's Instagram feed can make you feel like Norman no-mates. The curated holiday snaps of others set unrealistic expectations. "We know from reading interviews with influencers that in some of their most famous shoots, they were at their lowest," says O'Dwyer. Feel your feelings, but remind yourself that photos are not the full picture.
Start small
Saying "hello" to a colleague and asking about their weekend, going to a museum and being around others, spending time with a pet – small things can...
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